Some Dates Stick with us Forever!

Although it's been awhile, I'm still here.  So much has been going on that I decided to go on "Blog Hiatus" for six months. That's my story & I'm sticking to it!  I've missed writing.  But I also fight almost constant fatique which somedays makes doing anything other than taking a shower impossible. At one time or another I truly believe that everyone has said something to the effect " I'm bone tired. " or " I'm so tired I can't move. " or " I've never been this tired before. "...I think you get the idea. Now, imagine that feeling all day, every day, for weeks or months on end X fifty!  That's fatigue!  You can sleep a solid 9-hours and awaken exhausted. You must take a nap or you're falling asleep during dinner. I would venture a guess that 75% of the women I know with stage IV Cancer suffer from fatique. It's the #1 reason that we can no longer work, and it DEFINITELY differs from being tired! 😟 That's today's lesson, and is a really big part of why I had to go on hiatus for a while.

Now, on to the topic dejour! I don't know about you, but there have been certain dates over the course of my life that are indelibly etched in my mind. Some for obvious reasons, such as my birthday, which is in my opinion a very good date (!) some are horrid dates but definitely etched...such as 9/11!  Others have deep meaning to me and those close to me...Michael's (my son) date of birth, the day Don and I were married, Don's birthday...ok you get it.  Some dates I'd just as soon forget...the day I broke my wrist, the day I was rear-ended by a semi truck, the day Michael moved to MPLS, Chicago, NYC (😊 ok, I admit all of his moves have taken some getting used to for me!) , but I do believe one of the top dates I'll never ever forget was that day in April...three years ago...that began so innocently and ended with me knowing that life would never be the same. Because at 930am that day in April I was told that I had Stage IV Breast Cancer. The Cancer that I thought was "cured" was back and had spread!  Since that time I've had other dates come and go that were both good, bad, horrific and joyous. But friends, yesterday, October 21 at 830pm will be another date that is forever etched in my mind, for all the wrong reasons. I need to start from the beginning.

Three summers ago (2012) Don & I were at Leech Lake. We had the opportunity to meet a lovely couple, Jerry & Michelle Kleven. Jerry's parents were extremely close friends of my parents which is how we were introduced. It was a fun afternoon of laughter, sunshine, cocktails and friendship.  It was only marred by the fact that Michelle was nervous about an upcoming cancer biopsy the following week. The two of us talked through that for some time, exchanged phone numbers and hugs, and she promised to contact me once she had her results. **On a side note, Michelle happened to be one of those lovely people that I was immediately drawn to!  Her infectious laughter, her selflessness, her love of life were all things that I loved immediately!

Two weeks after our initial meeting I received a call from Michelle...her biopsy was positive for ovarian cancer (additionally she had many other complications that I won't get into!). As I was soon to learn, my new friend may have been terrified, but she was filled with optimism.  We spoke for hours that day.  We shared laughter and tears, and that day set the tone for a wonderful three year friendship!

Don and I were so blessed that they were able to come on the cruise that we took several years ago with my parents and Barb & Tom.  Michelle had just finished chemo (little did we know she'd be having more!) so she was quite tired, but she was thrilled to be there! Sadly, that was the last time I was able to see her face to face.  With me being unable to drive outside of Cold Spring, and her getting sicker and sicker, we relied on our phones. Boy did we log time on our cell phones! LOL!  It's a good thing we both had unlimited minutes!

This past August (2015) we were both thrilled because it appeared that we would FINALLY get to spend time together. She & Jerry had rented a cabin on Leech Lake...not far from my parents. I arranged to go to the lake for the same week.  We were both so excited, almost like children!  Each time we spoke we'd laugh and giggle...oh my gosh we could hardly wait. Sadly, days before they were to head north, Michelle became very ill and had to be hospitalized. We were both devastated...we cried & cried. Deep down I think we both knew that would be our last chance to see each other. We never verbalized that however!

I didn't hear much from my sweet friend after that, until six weeks ago.  I picked up my phone and she was crying on the other end. Her oncologist had just told her that it was only a matter of time...6-8 weeks.  I will never be able to describe what it was like to hear her say those words. I'm not really sure what I said in response, except to tell her how much I love her, admire her and that only God knows when it's our time. For the first time ever we had a short conversation. I heard from her once more, although I wrote to her and spoke to her through prayer daily!

Which brings us to October 21, 2015. I received the call I've been dreading...Jerry called to tell me that Michelle passed peacefully at approximately 730pm. My head knows she's in a better place (!) but my heart is broken for all of us that loved her so dearly.  Most importantly for her amazing and loving husband Jerry!

Thank you for letting me get this out, I really needed to do so to pay tribute to my friend!  I love each of you and I will try much harder to be here on a more regular basis!  As always, I ask that you keep my family in your prayers...especially Michael & Don.

With love always,
Kathy 💕💔

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 well October 21, 2015 is forever burned into my memory, for all the wrong reasons. For this evening, at approximately 730pm, my beautifully kind, loving, joyous, thoughtful, selfless friend...Michelle Kleven passed away from ovarian cancer. I will miss you very much sweet friend!  Thank you for being you.  I'm heartbroken!  You were on this Earth for such a short period of time, you should have lived to be 100!  I know that you are whole again, and finally out of pain.